In-law problems

In-law problems can be worked out. Here's how to start:
1. Keep your contacts with them to a minimum. Spend as little time with them as possible. Do not invite them over unless it's absolutely necessary. If they want come over and visit, then let them be entertained by your husband and son while you go run an errand, or make yourself scarce somewhere around the house.

2. Your husband needs to be supportive of you. If his parents snub you in any way, it's his responsibility to put a stop to it. They are his parents, so it is best that he speak up. Otherwise, it just gives the in-laws more reason to disapprove of you. His support of you is not being disloyal to his parents. It simply shows his parents that he respects you, and they must as well.

3. Do not invest yourself emotionally in them. Do not hope for a close relationship with them; their actions show it will never happen. Keep reminding yourself that they are the ones with the problem. Do not go out of your way to please them. For example, if it's their birthday, then it is your husband's responsibility to buy the card/gift and send it to them on behalf of both of you.

4. When around them, act pleasant so as not to give them any ammunition with which to use against you. Being pleasant does not mean you allow them to insult you. If they do insult you, shrug it off in a humorous way, then leave the room and busy yourself with something else.

5. You and your husband should see a marriage counselor to obtain guidance on how to strengthen your marriage and cope with specific in-law problems.